I don't hate Utah...I just don't like it.

Some people think I hate Utah. I don’t. However, I do not want to move back there. Why? Well, it’s complicated. But I’ve narrowed it down to five big reasons. These are my reasons not yours so don’t take them personal. Some of the reasons might come off humorous but they are meant to be serious. I have had conflicted emotions about my childhood home for sometime and they probably won’t be resolved anytime soon. Here they are in no particular order and if you are a Utah lover don’t be offended, however I offer no apologies.

1. Temptation: I was never tempted more to do things contrary to LDS standards than I was when growing up in Utah. While I was a teenager there were regular opportunities to drink, smoke, do drugs, etc. Who was offering these vices to me? My fellow Mormons, who else? Were these simply normal adolescent temptations? Perhaps. However, I was never tempted the same while serving in the army or living in Las Vegas and those were some high-stress times. As a matter of fact, my fellow soldiers frequently defended my decisions not to indulge in anything contrary to my belief and often complemented me for staying loyal to my principles. Though I stayed strong in my younger years (mostly in part to a fantastic circle of friends) I have always felt more tempted by my LDS peers than my non-LDS peers.

2. Entitlement: There is a bizarre sense of entitlement in Utah, one that I don’t think was there growing up. Many feel entitled to a house and not just any house but a dream home; you know the kind, large, lavish, and brand new. Sure, this is fine after completing an education or technical training, working for several years, saving up, and starting out with an older, simpler home but those homes high on the mountains are ridiculous! There is NO WAY there are that many rich people in Utah! How about the sense of entitlement to money and lots of it? Everyone wants to be an entrepreneur and feel they should be able to start their own big-buck business without completing an education or earning some sort of professional license. And then there is the sense of entitlement to Medicaid. This is for the poor so if you’re poor by all means use it, but it is not for families that intentionally get pregnant after refusing to purchase health insurance or get pregnant knowing they cannot afford the cost! Fun Fact: Utah regularly tops the most bankruptcies filed list.

3. Diversity: Alright, in all fairness there are a lot of pasty white states out there. But God has made an incredibly diverse world so why wouldn’t one want to live in a state/city surrounded by various cultures, languages, and foods? More than 50% of Mormons live outside the USA and we are all proud of that fact so why do so many Mormons seclude themselves to such a predominantly Caucasian state? It’s strange that many Utah Mormons go on missions to these incredibly diverse places then simply go back to where they came from. More dangerously this lack of diversity has led to xenophobia, racism, and bigotry. Seriously, I have never heard as many Jewish and Mexican jokes as I did growing up in Utah and occasionally when speaking with or reading something from there I cringe at some of the insensitive comments. The ironic part about those stupid jokes is that I never even met a single Jew growing up…that and I never met a Girl Scout while growing up either.

4. Complacency: As much as I am railing against my Utah Mormon counterparts I must admit, there are many wonderful members of the LDS church in Utah. I mean it, they are fun loving, kind, honest, hard working, and likeable. In other words they make far better ambassadors of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints than myself. So what do they choose to do? Stay in Utah, where they are safe with an LDS church literally every few blocks totally oblivious to the fact that in this country they are a religious minority. Come on! We are still one of the most misunderstood churches in the United States so what good are our best members doing living contently away in their mountain bubble? Work keeps them there you might say? Bull…true Utah has a very low unemployment rate but it is no secret that people make far less there than they would in other states. Their family is there you might say? Well, what is more important, educating people about and spreading the gospel or living close to family? As for me, I want to be able to look God in the eyes and say at least I tried; at least I opened myself up to the world and tried to help my fellow mankind understand that Mormons are not freaks.

5. Tragedy: Other than a couple uncomfortable years in junior high I had a happy childhood and I absolutely loved high school. I remember the trees I climbed, the mountains I hiked, and the fields I rode my bike through and today many are gone or seriously altered. Every time I go back to Utah some of my treasured memories are replaced by new houses, bull dozed trees, and flattened hills. But the tragic death of my mom on Christmas morning my senior year really ended my childhood. When my mom died two Daniels came into existence, “Before” and “After.” “Before Daniel” might have liked settling in Utah setting my son Henry up to the same temptations I experienced, living a life of entitlement and complacency with little or no diversity but the “After Daniel” loves life too much to spend it in a place I’ve already been, among people I already know, and giving into cultures and traditions that frankly make me feel uncomfortable at times. I feel that this is the last gift my mother gave me, that upon her death she was telling me there is no reason to be afraid of the unknown, no good reason to stay put but only selfish ones. It was time for me to go and explore God’s creation, the world that she was forced to leave. And that is why I left Utah.

For those that I love that are still in Utah (and there are many of you, I think you know who you are) I respect your decisions to stay where you are, even though quite frankly I don’t get why one would want to stay when there is an option. However, these are my reasons for leaving Utah and it is a decision I have had to struggle with on my own. However, I am happy with my decision and though I don’t know where life will take me next I do know it won’t be Utah.

EDITOR’S NOTE: However, I can be bought! Though I sincerely hope fate never takes me to Utah I will do what is best for my career and family and if for some shocking reason (it occasionally happens) the best opportunities come my way in Utah then so be it, to the Beehive State with me (grudgingly).